Man Makes Mystery Discovery While Repairing Automatic Car Window…

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Ok, now picture yourself in this situation. Your wife has been nagging you for months to fix the driver’s side window in your car. Seems she’s fed up with having to actually walk inside the Starbucks to get her daily Grande, iced, sugar-free vanilla latte with soy milk, and having to endure rude baristas, smelly artsy hipster types, and snooty would-be captains of industry. She’s even gone so far as to question your manhood, reminding you once again that her father fixed three cars under a shade tree before breakfast.

So, ego bruised and looking to save some face, you head out to fix that window motor, or whatever the heck is wrong with it. After ripping the guts out, you see something that doesn’t seem like it belongs there. What’s that, you say?. Why, whaddaya know? It’s thousands of dollars in cold hard cash.

At this point, you might start jumping around the yard screaming “Eureka!” and generally acting like a fool, or if you’re of a cooler temperament, you take a deep breath, and begin to ponder where this windfall might have come from. Three possibilities come to mind:

  1. Your wife has finally decided to make good on her threat to run off to Bimini with that guy at the office she claims she’s just ‘good friends’ with.
  2. Your teenage Eagle Scout son is really the neighborhood drug lord.
  3. God is just really happy with you for some reason.

Regardless of the source, you’re faced with a dilemma. Do you keep it? Do you turn it over to the cops? Try to find the car’s previous owner and return it? Deep questions indeed.

In this case though, the cops did get it. That’s because this hoard of moolah was discovered when a hapless fellow tried to cross into Mexico in a 1998 Ford Expedition. A currency sniffing dog (did you even know they had those?) smelled the loot, all $410,980 of it, and now the driver is cooling his heels as a guest of Homeland Security. The Border Patrol is keeping the money of course. Had he just declared it, and had a really good story, he might have been Ok. What a maroon. Isn’t this like the oldest trick on all the cop TV shows?

Kinda Gets You To Wondering Though

What other kinds of unusual stuff gets found in cars? Turns out, not surprisingly, all kinds. After many hours of scouring the Internet, this author has come up with a short list of things commonly found in cars by those who have reason to look, folks like mechanics, junkyard scrappers, and rental car businesses…

  • Shown here, the stash included upwards of $400,000!

    Shown here, the stash included upwards of $400,000!

    Drugs – Well duh, you might say. People use cars to transport drugs, people use drugs in cars. But you have to wonder why someone would leave large amounts of drugs in their cars, like 100 pounds of marijuana, or 50 keys of coke. Happens all the time. Kinda wonder what the story is behind that. And you remember that Cheech and Chong movie where they drove the van made of pot? It’s been tried.

  • Guns – These are also found frequently in cars, although usually because someone just forgot their piece in the glove box, or a hunter left his guns in the trunk. Other times they’ve been stolen, or used in a crime.
  • Animals – Little furry creatures love to snuggle up in the most obscure places. One mechanic reports sticking his head into the trunk, through a hole where the rear seat was, and coming nose-to-sharp tooth with a family of rats. His insurance declined his claim. Then there’s the folks who forget their precious pets in their cars. Usually they’re still alive. Snakes are found more often than anything for some reason.
  • Children – How the heck someone could forget their kid is asleep in the backseat when they drop it off at the shop, or return it to the rental place, or even abandon it, is hard to fathom. But again, it’s a fairly frequent occurrence.

And Then There’s Strange

273176-smuggling-cigarettes-in-soccer-ballThose are the most common things found, but every once in awhile some really world-class wierd stuff is discovered.

  • A car detailer in Australia reported that, upon opening the trunk of a car, he discovered a dozen, apparently real, human shrunken heads. The authorities were called, and the owner explained he had just returned from a field expedition to New Guinea, and the heads were collected from native tribes for ‘research’.
  • In the same vein, Egyptian police investigating a car parked on the side of the road found several parts of mummies inside. The car’s owner was trying to smuggle illegal antiquities out of the country. They frown on that in Egypt, he’s in big trouble.
  • A rental car business discovered several prosthetics, or fake arms and legs, in a returned car. Turned out the owner was an inventor trying to make a better limb.

You just can’t make this stuff up. What would you do?

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